'I went into Mammy mode': A Midleton mother reflects on her cancer journey

Katherine Dolphin Griffin discovered her children were more resilient than she had expected 

Katherine Dolphin-Griffin, at her home in Knockgorm, Midleton, Co Cork.

Katherine Dolphin Griffin was making her daughter’s First Communion dress when she was diagnosed with papillary thyroid cancer in 2012.

Following full thyroidectomy, the Midleton-based mum of Mia, now 17, and Colin, 13, went on radioactive iodine therapy. This meant taking a radioactive tablet to soak up any thyroid cells still present post-surgery – plus a week in the isolation unit in CUH.

Once home, Katherine had to be ultra-careful not to expose her family to any danger of radioactivity. “This meant six weeks of no contact. I’m a tactile person, a hugger – not being able to hug my children was so hard,” says Katherine, recalling how this was all happening around when Mia was making her First Confession.

Her diagnosis brought big worries about how her children would adapt to the new reality. “I went into mammy mode, thinking how I could minimise the change for them.”

She found clear communication essential. “I told them on a need-to-know basis. I explained the surgery was for my throat to take my thyroid out, there’d be a little scar and I’d be a bit tired. I said ‘isn’t it great – surgery to make me better.”

Cork ARC Cancer Support supported her around explaining radioactive iodine treatment. “It was magic medicine that would give out invisible rays. It’d make me better, but wouldn’t be safe for them. I said I could stay at home if we followed certain rules – they couldn’t touch me or come within two metres of me. They followed the rules for six weeks.”

Katherine learned a lot about herself as a mother – and about her children’s resilience. Prior to her diagnosis, she’d never left her children even for one night. “When I had to go into the isolation unit, I felt guilty, thinking why I hadn’t left them more so this wouldn’t be such a shock to them.”

This memory returned just a few years ago when Katherine felt conflicted about accepting a friend’s invitation to accompany her on a week’s holiday. “I realised when you’re investing in children so much through the years, they’re able to survive without you temporarily. They have the skills. And they were delighted for me, that I was going off for something fun.”

Wishing above all to be a good role model, Katherine wants to show her children there’s always an option B – and that it’s good to give back. She recently published her book, Hope to Cope, documenting her journey of perseverance through difficult times. 

• Priced at €15, proceeds go to Irish Cancer Society and Marymount Hospice.

Katherine Dolphin’s self-made ‘famous five strategies’ for patience with herself:

• What jobs are urgent? List one job each day rather than looking at an extensive list.
• What’s the worst that can happen?  Find the priority job and make that number one on the list.
• What can I achieve right now?
• Who can help me? Perhaps friends/family can take the children to free me up for more time-consuming jobs.
• What do I need to achieve next?