Richard Hogan: We have to stop demonising those in our society who are unvaccinated

"When we are reunited with family members we haven’t been around in a while there is the potential for conflict at the best of times, this may arise from discussing issues such as politics, wars, climate, even partners."

We’re two days out from Christmas 2021 and we are all wondering what sort of shape it will take. It is incredibly demoralising to take steps backwards after such long periods of moving in the right direction. This holiday period has the potential to be particularly fractious if you don’t put a simple boundary in place.

When we are reunited with family members we haven’t been around in a while there is the potential for conflict at the best of times, this may arise from discussing issues such as politics, wars, climate, even partners. 

But this Christmas, with everything that we have gone through in the last 20 months, feels like it has the potential to be particularly conflicted, especially if one of the family members is returning from abroad and is unvaccinated.

All this vaccinated, and unvaccinated talk has caused a serious schism in our society. This is not healthy. We have to stop demonising those in our society who are unvaccinated. There are many reasons why someone chooses not to take the vaccine and the current rules mean that anyone unvaccinated is unable to go into pubs or restaurants and mingle with vaccinated people. 

So, let’s stop the hysteria around unvaccinated people and not assume the reason for their choice is because they are selfish and uncaring about their societal obligation. Of course, most of us know that the more of us that are vaccinated the less strain there is on the health system. But some people will not take the vaccine no matter what information is available.

Michel Foucault says that where there is power there will always be resistance. Perhaps, that’s what’s happening here. Maybe the reluctance to take the vaccine is about fear or power, and the fact that even with over 90% vaccinated we are still living with restrictions. I hear this a lot in my clinic and in society. 

People are confused. Perhaps rather than castigating those who think like this maybe we should be improving our messaging. Maybe those who are unsure about the vaccine are not right-wing nuts and flat earth conspiracy theorists but rather scared and uncertain about the efficacy of the product they are being asked to take. And by calling them names and trying to force them to take it, we are further polarising them in their position.

This brings me to this Christmas holiday. There are many families currently unsure about what to do with a family member who is coming for dinner and is unvaccinated. My first piece of advice is, do not do anything you are uncomfortable with. If you would rather that family member didn’t come because of their vaccination status be honest and transparent about it.

You will thank yourself for this approach because if you are not honest and go against your own wishes the potential for serious conflict increases dramatically. Just imagine the scene over Christmas, a few drinks in and the conversation moves to Covid-19 and the recent restrictions (which inevitably it will move to) now you have a highly explosive charge waiting to detonate. 

The next logical step in that conversation is talking about the vaccination programme and boosters. This is only going to lead to one outcome, a very heated debate about the pros and cons of vaccinations. Now you are in heavy themes like social responsibility, selfishness, the greater good, government power, etc - you are now in the middle of the perfect storm for family fallout. Therefore, by listening to yourself and doing what you are comfortable with you will prevent this from occurring.

Let’s just say you have decided to invite that member of the family that is unvaccinated it is vitally important that you set boundaries before they arrive. The first one might be, q PCR test. The best way not to pass the virus is not to have it. 

So, this is a reasonable request and I don’t think anyone would be too put out at this stage in this virus to do that. Also, I would boundary the potential conversation. I would say something like, "We’re all really looking forward to seeing you and we are all really sick of Covid-19 and talking about it, we want this Christmas free from Covid talk, so we asking everyone coming not to talk about it and let’s enjoy our Christmas."

We are all a little world-weary and fatigued with Covid-19. We need to stop the hysteria around the vaccination programme and stop demonising those in society who are slower to take the vaccine than the rest of us. Christmas will be over soon, this current pandemic will be over too. 

We will look back on how we managed ourselves during it, do we want to say we turned on our loved ones? Or that we met the challenge with dignity and courage. Happy Christmas, enjoy this season. It has been such a privilege to talk to you through this column over the year. Remember our great poet, Seamus Heaney's words, "If we can winter this out, we can summer anywhere."