Learner Dad: We’re thinking of moving to the country 

FREE TO ROAM: Pat Fitzpatrick and his family are considering a move to the countryside, which may involve raising chickens. Picture: iStock 

We’re thinking of moving house. It’s hard because our current home is pretty much part of the family at this stage and the kids would probably give it a hug if they could get their arms around it. The problem is they nearly could get their arms around it. W e’ve outgrown it at this stage and it feels like their last few growth spurts have used up half the house.

The question is where next. I’ve lived close to the city centre in either Dublin or Cork for the last 30 years . I like that everything is nearby , you can walk into town and some wild countryside is just half an hour away by car. People talk about 15-minute cities now, where everything you need like school, shops, hospitals is no more than a quarter of an hour away. I’m a fan of that.

My wife, who has lived in one city or another all her life, wants the countryside. We’re not talking about an estate on the outskirts of a medium-sized county town either. She wants a stand-alone place if possible, or else a plot by the sea. There is talk of chickens. 

My initial reaction to everything is to say no, so I said no. Apparently, that’s not a great way to run a relationship, so I’ve taken a step back and wondered if we could hack it as culchies.

Actually, I reckon my wife and I would love a rural life. (Any time I leave the city, I feel better about things .)

But t his isn’t really about us - it’s about the kids. It’s not like I was going to the opera every Tuesday night before Covid came along – a move to the country wouldn't have a huge impact on my work or social life, as long as we have decent broadband.

It’s more about schools and friends for the kids, and how much of the rest of my life I want to spend driving them to a nightclub in Macroom.  

I know that extra car time is the price you pay for living in rural Ireland because it’s the one thing that my friends living there mention when I ask for advice. A buddy near Westport describes hour-long round trips for GAA training; a guy I know out beyond Ovens says there is no escaping the car, even living that close to Cork city.

My wife’s friend s tell her the same thing, often while driving their kids back from swimming or drama. But here’s the thing – ask them if they’ve ever thought of moving back into the city and they’ ll look at you like you have two heads. People who live in the country, love living in the country.

So we might choose to live in the country. Obviously, there is going to be some kind of adjustment. As I said, the kids love our current house and get a bit anxious every time we talk about the latest place up on Daft or Myhome. We had a long hard think about this and decided to bribe them with a PlayStation. Now that’s what I call parenting.

It means we’ll probably have to move now that the kids are very keen on it, what with a PlayStation on the line. In the end, we might make a pragmatic decision and stick with the convenience of city living. Whatever way we go, it will be hard to leave out current place behind. My wife and I have lived here for 15 years. 

When I asked my eight-year-old why she would hate to move, she said: “Because I’ve lived here all my life, Dad”.

That’s a good answer . This slightly-too-small house has been our anchor as a family. We’re really lucky to have it when you see the stress and uncertainty that other parents have to endure in temporary accommodation. It’s a lot more than a few walls with a small garden out the back.

But you make your own home. There will be an adjustment, yet I’m sure we’ll make loads more happy memories wherever we end up. Who knows, it might even involve a few chickens.