Suzanne Harrington: A shark! We're gonna need a bigger bottle of sunscreen

I try to imagine what would happen if a small sea creature with the capacity to kill 26 humans turned up on an Irish beach. There’d be media helicopters overhead, snipers on the roof, the military on stand-by. It’d be on the evening news

Australians love nothing more than to swim in seas not just teeming with lethal blue octopi, but churning with giant waves, ferocious currents and deadly riptides. Seas that are full of sharks.

The blue-ringed octopus is very pretty and only about the size of your hand, but carries enough venom to kill 26 humans simultaneously, if 26 humans were to simultaneously annoy it enough.

It’s not aggressive though, explains my daughter: “Only if you get on its nerves.”