Colm O'Regan: I'm enjoying my Olympic-themed dreams, but the pole vault eludes me
Comedian and Irish Examiner columnist Colm O'Regan pictured in Cork. Picture: Denis Minihane
I tell you this much about the Olympics. It certainly makes day-dreams challenging. My sports day-dreams normally are fairly hum-drum and cover a very narrow range of sports. Iām an All Ireland hurling winner, then football the following year. (I used to be a fantasy dual-star but the game has gone too professional for that.) Then I retire, join Cork City to win numerous trophies, stay loyal to Cork City for long enough to get a big transfer fee. And then join an unfashionable yet well-run professional club who I take to Champions League glory before retiring at 43 to be a really insightful pundit. Also Iām hot.
But the Olympics means I have to up my game. To make even larger leaps of fantasy. Literally sometimes. Running is relatively easy. We all run. And I am the first man in pretend-history to compete at every event from 800m to marathon. I bowed out of the sprint events aged six. Any time Iām running now behind someone jogging slightly slower than me, the commentary plays in my head. āAnd step by step OāRegan hauls in the Kenyan. This is extraordinary. My fellow commentators are on their feetā etc etc.
