Paula Hynes: The menopause can be like the worst storm

Menopause can a huge challenge for women so it is important to seek medical advice and support as I did, and find out what works for you

Pete and Paula Hynes enjoying 15 years of farming together. Picture: Clare Keogh

As farmers, our job is governed by the weather, and as luck would have it, while on our recent trip away from farming, the weather chose to try and interrupt our holiday as Storm Claudio hit the Canary Islands.

The islands had multiple weather warnings, schools were closed, and authorities were on high alert. The area where we were staying was hit by 40km an hour winds, with 15mm of rain. 

For us, as hardened Irish farming tourists, the weather simply felt normal, and as we walked to the restaurant for breakfast in shorts and T-shirts, the staff simply laughed, knowing full well what they considered extreme weather was part of our normal daily life.

With breakfast complete, we decided to escape the rain and have a duvet morning. Our chosen entertainment was rewatching Emily in Paris again. We love Paris and have many friends there, so we laugh at the Netflix show in a different way, as we know the culture and have a grasp of the French humour. 

Laughing our way through episode one, episode two suddenly reminded me of one of the reasons we got away to enjoy quality time together — my life challenge of the last few years, and especially this year, with all the health tests and worry of what I may face and how we as a couple may face challenge. Well as you all know, my health tests are clear. 

In episode two, Emily worked on the Le Vaga-Jeune advertising campaign. Yes, it was funny TV, but more importantly, it highlighted a huge challenge for us women, the menopause, and yes, it is not masculine!

My health issues began a few years ago when, as a woman in her very early 40s, my world started to fall apart — the slightest thing made me emotional. I would cry milking cows in the morning, get angry at the slightest thing, be very snappy to those around me, and especially Pete. 

I gained weight, had sleepless nights and would be sweating while working — even on cold days. I was far too young to be going through the menopause, or was I? 

For over two years, it was passed off as the fact I worked too hard, got too stressed and was possibly just a grumpy mum and maybe a grumpy wife.

Storm Claudio looming over the Canary Islands, while Paula and Pete were there on a much-needed holiday from farming.

Pete always felt it was more, but I constantly disagreed, as there was no way I could be menopausal. The reality was I was going through pre-menopause — my hormones were making my life a living nightmare for me and the ones I loved around me. In some ways, there was perhaps a perception that only older women face the menopause.

Finally, with the help of my GP, I started to regain control. I fully believe we, as women going through the menopause, should feel no shame, regardless of age — it is a part of life and a huge challenge for us all. Not every solution works for every woman. 

I had the coil fitted by my GP and was then prescribed HRT patches, which were a great help, but then the brand available changed, and suddenly some days they worked and some days I felt horrific. The patches kept coming loose under my work clothing or would fall off in bed. After starting to gain control, I was suddenly losing control again.

Out of the blue one day, I discovered a herbal tablet that helped regulate hormone levels. I would have tried anything because I hated my life and finally knew what the issue was, but could not control it. 

I literally felt like I had won the lotto when two weeks after beginning the hormonal tablets, normality was returning. I was back in control of myself. I began to feel so good about myself this year, was more comfortable in my own body, regained a little glow and could smile on any day of the week. 

I guess regaining control was also hugely positive for my marriage and relationship. I didn’t feel like the nagging wife, Pete worried less about me, we laugh together, and we can also disagree, knowing it doesn’t result in world war three between us.

Sometimes, the side-effect of regulating hormone levels is that the metabolism also begins to regulate itself. When that happened to me, I began to lose body fluid and menopausal weight gain. My diet didn’t change, but I continued to lose weight, so much so I was a size 18 in April 2025, and now I am a size 12.

That is dramatic weight-loss, which has thankfully now been regulated, but I do keep an eye to make sure it is not continuing to drop.

I underwent extensive medical tests with a consultant to be 100% sure no other health issue was causing the weight-loss, and those tests in so many ways were a huge worry for both of us as a couple. 

Thankfully, I have a complete clean bill of health. Body weight is not an issue — sometimes it is portrayed that way, but I was happy with my body when I was size 18, just as I am now, rather than letting the menopause defeat me or control my life. 

I’ve managed to turn around and say to that feminine part of growing older that I want to feel amazing and happy in life, and hey, menopause you can live with me and be a part of me, but you don’t own me, we can live together.

The health challenge also reminded me of a close friend and photographer in Paris, Gloria. She photographs women who have gone through a life experience or challenge, and she empowers those women through her camera lens by simply showing them they are beautiful.

As women, we all need to remind each other at times that we are beautiful, we need to empower each other and say yes, absolutely, it is okay for a young 40-year-old woman to be challenged by the menopause. 

Just like the weather may seem like a small issue for some and actually be a huge challenge for others. For some women, the menopause can be a walk in the park, and for others, it may be like the worst storm in your life. 

For those of you who are going through the menopause or may feel like you are at the beginning, seek medical advice and support, and you truly will find what works for you.