Noonan’s forecast: water will be scarce

My recently expanding respect for Michael Noonan was dented badly earlier this week, when he appeared on our national TV screens, straight-faced and bold as brass, and described our national water as being, and I quote, “a scarce resource”.

With great regret, I have to respond that I’ve not heard a more nonsensical statement for many months.

It is a fact that on the bulletins which carried Mr Noonan’s statement about the scarcity of Irish water, the reporters covering the other stories of the day were shivering and sheltering under battered umbrellas, as the allegedly scarce resource did its best to drown them.