"Where is her son? Unlawfully detained in prison? Rotting in a dank cell somewhere? Captured by bandits? Erm, no. He’s the boss of Spanish football."

"We call it the trans ‘debate’, as we deem ourselves qualified to ‘debate’ the lived experiences of a tiny, tiny minority - a minority who, one suspects, would quite like to just get on with their lives..."

"Who eats Nutella for breakfast? The French, that’s who. And the Irish, when they’re there."

I’d rather die than go to Dubai, and the Canaries leave me cold

"And yet there have been some people — right-wing people, mostly but not exclusively in possession of testicles — who have been triggered. Triggered!"

We’re the same age, Sinéad and I, and so grew up in the same Ireland, the one that allowed all the horror to happen to women and girls and babies and children

We need our protestors. They are the ones who will instigate change, while the rest of us are busy looking at our phones or being distracted by this week’s scandal

"He doesn’t seem to like being touched anywhere near his hind legs, they say. Neither would you, I think, if the last time anyone spent any time there was to castrate you."

"What began in a single field on the famous Glastonbury ley line is now the size of Bath - what used to be genuinely anarchic has grown into a cultural institution without losing its hippie heart or ethics"

Outdated and unfair, it's time we left the Leaving Cert in the past.