Parents of toddler killed by careless driver deliver heart breaking victim impact statements

The mother of three-year-old Estlin Wall has told the driver who caused the fatal collision that claimed her daughter’s life that whatever sentence he receives “it will pale in comparison to the life sentence of pain and sorrow we have been given”.

In a heartbreaking victim impact statement delivered at Ennis Circuit Court today, Amy Wall stated that “Estlin pays the highest price, sentenced to death that day with no chance of survival”.

In the case, father of two, Senan O’Flaherty (63) of Lower Gowerhass, Cooraclare has pleaded guilty to driving without due care and attention causing the death of Estlin Wall and serious bodily harm to Vincent Wall at Ballyea South, Inagh on March 15, 2017.

Judge Gerald Keys today stated that he would reserve judgement and counsel for the State, Lorcan Connolly BL asked that Judge Keys pronounce sentence before May as Amy is expecting the couple’s third child in May.

Estlin was fatally injured in a road crash moments after the truck driver, Mr O’Flaherty made “a bad move” to pull out from behind a bus, the court has heard.

At around 9am on March 15 2017, Vincent Wall (41) was driving his daughter Estlin to creche in Inagh from their home in Ennistymon, north Clare.

Mr Wall suffered a severe and significant brain injury as a result of the crash, has no recollection of the accident and was placed in an induced coma after the crash and missed Estlin’s funeral.

In court today, Estlin’s two parents, Amy and Vincent took under just under one hour to read out their extensive victim impact statements.

After they were complete, counsel for Mr O’Flaherty, Michael Collins SC stated that “one would want to have a heart of stone not to be moved by the eloquence and emotion in the victim impact statements”.

In her statement, Ms Wall addressed Mr O’Flaherty but not by name when she stated: ”You put out her light, but I vow to carry her torch forever.

"Not a day will pass that I will not ache for her. But a mother’s love can never die and it is that love that will carry me forward every day.”

Speaking about the loss of Estlin, Ms Wall stated: “Now, she truly is forever young. A beautiful little girl that never made it to her fourth birthday, was buried by the sea days before she should have been blowing candles out on a cake. She is frozen in time now and we will never know what kind of woman she would have become.

“I will never experience her first day at school, the tumultuous teenage years of such a self-assured child, see her graduate from university, fall in love, become a mother herself.

“A branch of our family tree that will never grow. A light snuffed out so young. For what? To save a few minutes? Because you were impatient? Annoyed? Frustrated? As a professional driver, you should have been driving with extra care. Instead, a child is dead, forever. Because for whatever awful reason, my husband’s car had to cross paths with your truck that day. And in a split second, we lost everything."

Ms Wall stated: “In the end, it makes no difference whether the courts say you were driving dangerously or carelessly or negligently or stupid. Estlin will always be dead. Vinnie will live with the effects of a brain injury for the rest of his life. Our children will never know Estlin, but we will talk about her every day.

“Estlin Luna Wall was born wanted, loved, adored, cherished. She lived three years and 356 days and died tragically in an absolutely unnecessary car crash that you caused.

“But after today, I don’t want you to be part of her story anymore. You might have said that you are guilty, but there is no punishment that can bring Estlin back.

Ms Wall added: “I hope with all my might that you understand how catastrophic your impatience was. But you’ll never fully understand that the damage you have done, because you never had the pleasure of knowing Estlin, so you cannot possibly know the magnitude of her loss.

Earlier in her statement, Ms Wall stated: “I know that I will deeply grieve the loss of Estlin every moment of my life until I take my last breath.

“I will always regret that the crash fundamentally changed my husband in irreparable ways.

“I know that I will be heartbroken none of my surviving children will ever have their own memories of their big sister.

"I know that my role as a mother will never look the same.

“I know that holidays and birthdays and anniversaries will always be filled with sadness.

“I know that there will be moments five, ten, thirty years down the road that Estlin’s death will still bring me to my knees, tear my soul in two, and make me wish for death and the chance of a reunion.

“And oh, what a presence Estlin was. What a force, a vibrancy, a joy and delight she was to us. She commanded a room when she entered into it, first by just looking at her, her signature golden yellow curls, her massive blue eyes framed by the longest lashes I’ve ever seen on a child.

In his victim impact statement, Vincent ‘Vinny’ Wall stated that he would trade places with Estlin if he could.

He stated: “I compare to my injuries to what Estlin got and every day I am certain that I would trade places and take death if she could live. I would not hesitate. But unfortunately, these are imaginary bargains. Real-life can be brutal and unforgiving.

“I wish there were time machines, replay buttons or dreams come true but there are none of these things. I try to do things that make me happy but things are different now, happiness s out of reach.

“I’m in a fog that won’t lift now. It’s dark and I’m drifting through the seasons. There are some tranquil days and some stormy days that could swallow me.”

Mr Wall stated that he remained in hospital and didn’t know why he was there.

He stated: “Why was I in this strange place…I wondered what I did that caused these injuries. Maybe a collision while playing soccer? Maybe a fall off my bike? Maybe something happened when I was in the car.

“In my guts I must have had the awful suspicion that something terrible had happened to me and her but I was unable to piece together my thoughts and petrified to even ask about her.”

When he finally told by family and doctors that Estlin had died, Mr Wall stated: “I could understand the words. It made sense. But the brain injury made it difficult to process my thoughts and turn the facts into an emotional reaction

“Death of a child is a worst nightmare. Death of a child when you can’t grasp the importance is a worst, worst nightmare."

He stated: “Estlin was amazing to me. She was so clever, so imaginative, so caring and so talented. Nobody has a child and thinks about planning its funeral. Nobody gets their child dressed in the morning and thinks, these could be the clothes she dies in.

“We still keep Estlin’s room in our house, it’s intact, a shrine.

“We go in there every day. Her clothes. Her books. Her drawings. Her toys. On her bed lies what’s left of the clothes I dressed her that dreadful morning. They are in tatters and smell of fumes. Cut to shreds on the oily roadside by the paramedics as they tried to resuscitate her limp body

“I imagined a long life of milestones for Estlin. First day of schools graduation, leaving home, wedding, having her own child. Now choosing her tombstone is the only milestone ahead.”

Counsel for Mr O’Flaherty, Mr Collins stated that there are no aggravating factors on his client’s part in the accident.

He stated that there no speed, no recklessness and no drink driving involved.

He stated: “Whatever sentence will not right the wrongs and may facilitate part of the recovery and no sentence can turn back the clock.”

He added: “The consequences of this accident and Mr O’Flaherty’s role in it are profound and will continue to be profound. Life taking and life-changing and nothing I can say can change that.”

Judge Keys adjourned the case to next Monday for mention only.

From the victim impact statement of Estlin's father, Vincent

The crash left me unconscious and I didn’t wake up for weeks. The seat belt and car seat kept Estlin and I in our seated positions but the violent swing of the car and massive jolt of the collision threw our heads around like pinballs.

At the same time as Estlin’s funeral, my eyelids and fingers were starting to twitch. I missed my own child’s funeral. When she was lowered into the ground, I was in a bed in Beaumont hospital.

It was clear to my doctors and visitors that I had no recollection of the crash. I did not know that something terrible had happened to Estlin and I.

Why was I in this strange place…I wondered what I did that caused these injuries. Maybe a collision while playing soccer? Maybe a fall off my bike? Maybe something happened when I was in the car.

In my guts, I must have had the awful suspicion that something terrible had happened to me and her but I was unable to piece together my thoughts and petrified to even ask about her.

The death of a child is a worst nightmare. Death of a child when you can’t grasp the importance is a worst, worst nightmare.

Eventually, it hit me but that slowness continues. My feelings are still disconnected from the information I know. I sit blankly through the saddest of situations but I cry in a casual conversation.

I visit her grave with nothing but memories. I imagine her at that spot on the roadside every time we pass. Things I can’t see dominate my life now. I want to see her ghost but I never do.

I lived by simple rules. Do the right thing, pay your way, you’ll get what you deserve. Deserve is the word that keeps repeating in my mind. I didn’t deserve this. Estlin didn’t deserve that. She deserved to get to creche safely

The bus passengers deserved to travel safely so their driver drove cautiously. You thought you deserved to go faster than bus and now we are here. Now, the judge decides what you deserve.

You pulled out in front of me and in a reflex reaction, I swerved into the ditch. What followed was out of my control. My car must have swung and hit that car like a hammer hitting a nail. Estlin was right at the point of contact. No chance. Nail in the coffin.

You didn’t deserve to drive like that.

Estlin was amazing to me. She was so clever, so imaginative, so caring and so talented. Nobody has a child and thinks about planning its funeral. Nobody gets their child dressed in the morning and thinks, these could be the clothes she dies in.

We still keep Estlin’s room in our house, it’s intact, a shrine.

We go in there every day. Her clothes. Her books. Her drawings. Her toys. On her bed lies what’s left of the clothes I dressed her that dreadful morning. They are in tatters and smell of fumes. Cut to shreds on the oily roadside by the paramedics as they tried to resuscitate her limp body.

I imagined a long life of milestones for Estlin. First day of schools graduation, leaving home, wedding home, having her own child. Now choosing her tombstone is the only milestone ahead.

I compare to my injuries to what she got and every day I am certain that I would trade places and take death if she could live. I would not hesitate. But unfortunately, these are imaginary bargains. Real-life can be brutal and unforgiving.

I wish there were time machines, replay buttons or dreams come true but there are none of these things. I try to do things that make me happy but things are different now, happiness s out of reach.

I’m in a fog that won’t lift now. It’s dark and I’m drifting through the seasons. There are some tranquil days and some stormy days that could swallow me.

Whatever my mood, I always know that I’m not on solid ground and what’s around me and ahead of me is uncertain and what’s below me is inevitable.

She’s under there somewhere. That’s what life feels like now. That’s how my brain injury is. That’s what you did.

From the victim impact statement of Estlin's mother, Amy

I know that I will deeply grieve the loss of Estlin every moment of my life until I take my last breath.

I will always regret that the crash fundamentally changed my husband in irreparable ways.

I know that I will be heartbroken none of my surviving children will ever have their own memories of their big sister.

I know that my role as a mother will never look the same.

I know that holidays and birthdays and anniversaries will always be filled with sadness.

I know that there will be moments five, ten, thirty years down the road that Estlin’s death will still bring me to my knees, tear my soul in two, and make me wish for death and the chance of a reunion.

And oh, what a presence Estlin was. What a force, a vibrancy, a joy and delight she was to us. She commanded a room when she entered into it, first by just looking at her, her signature golden yellow curls, her massive blue eyes framed by the longest lashes I’ve ever seen on a child.

Her little pixie voice could stop you in your tracks, she sounded like a fairy. She would have grown tall and slender like her father.

I named her long before I had ever even met Vinnie. I knew, if I ever was blessed with a daughter, I would call her after my favourite poet. And it was so fitting, this gorgeous thing as delicate and stunning as a poem.

She loved to sing and dance, to perform in front of family and friends. She loved all things girly, Disney princesses, dress-up dress, pink sparkles, dolls and ponies, crafting, painting and colouring.

Estlin truly was a bright star. She took her first steps at nine and a half months, had an amazing grasp on language very young, bossed all her friends around - younger and older.

She was self-confident beyond her years, independent, creative, and clever. Yet, as soon as she felt tired and had her tag blanket and plush baby doll in her arms, she resorted right back to being like a baby sucking her thumb and I’d want to wrap her up in her little arms and keep her that way forever.

Now, she truly is forever young. A beautiful little girl that never made it to her fourth birthday, was buried by the sea days before she should have been blowing candles out on a cake. She is frozen in time now and we will never know what kind of woman she would have become.

I will never experience her first day at school, the tumultuous teenage years of such a self-assured child, see her graduate from university, fall in love, become a mother herself.

A branch of our family tree that will never grow. A light snuffed out so young. For what? To save a few minutes? Because you were impatient? Annoyed? Frustrated? As a professional driver, you should have been driving with extra care. Instead, a child is dead, forever. Because for whatever awful reason, my husband’s car had to cross paths with your truck that day. And in a split second, we lost everything.

Estlin has been an incredible big sister. She wanted to be involved in every aspect of Mannix’s care. She loved to watch me change nappies. She’d help to bathe him, gently wiping his chest and tummy with a cloth. She’d even nestle close as I had nursed him and say while rubbing his head ‘get a good latch boy!’ She was the proudest big sister

On the journey to University Hospital Limerick where Vinnie and Estlin has been taken after the crash, Amy recalls: “I remember praying so hard, to whomever was listening ‘please let Estlin be okay, please let Estlin by okay, whatever has happened, I just need my little girl to be okay.

At the hospital, Amy recalls "Again someone asked to hold the baby and I knew at that moment, Mannix will be the thing to keep me strong so I held him so tightly, looking down at his beautiful face, so similar to his sister’s as they told me ‘Estlin will die’.

I did not scream and cry, but it was as if the earth had opened up in front of me and all I could do was sit silently and stare at where the solid ground of my life used to be.

None of it felt real, even now, I'm saying it all out loud, it doesn’t feel real, I was defeated instantly. There was no miracle, no prayer, no hope, no maybes or what-ifs.