Sex advice with Suzi Godson: Taking the lead when it comes to submission

Suzi Godson offers the latest relationship advice.

In our day-to-day life, my boyfriend is gentle and caring. However, when we have sex he tends to be the dominant one, which I like. Sometimes, if he is tired or lacks confidence, he is more submissive and I find this far less attractive. I like to think we have an equal relationship and it feels horribly old-fashioned to like only his dominant side, but I can’t help it.

Like most normal people, your boyfriend’s emotional state influences his sexual behaviour. Sometimes he feels like a master of the universe and pins you down and ravishes you. At other times your gentle boyfriend wants gentle sex. There is nothing unusual about this. How a person feels — up or down, comic or stern, sober or tipsy, tired or awake — alters the nature of any sexual interaction.