Good snews

Saturday, June 23, 2012

An estimated one in four families experience sleep problems during a child’s early years, but there is help out there for parents, writes Lucy Taylor,

HAVING a baby can be daunting, and establishing routines is often a struggle. If a baby doesn’t sleep well and wakes often during the night, parents can quickly become exhausted and feel alone. An estimated one in four families experience sleep problems during a child’s early years. The good news is that there is help out there for parents in Ireland in the form of sleep coaching.

Yvonne and Geoff O’Sullivan have two children, Josh, nearly three, and Sophie, 18 months — they live outside Ennis, Co Clare.

“Josh was fine until he was unwell and came into our bed,” says Yvonne. “After that he wouldn’t go to sleep without me. He would play with my hair while he was asleep so I couldn’t leave him or he’d wake up. Sophie was waking up for two bottles during the night. I was at my wits’ end when a friend mentioned a sleep expert called Lucy Wolfe. Geoff and I drove to see her in Cork for a two-hour consultation.”

Paediatric sleep consultant and mum of four young children, Lucy Wolfe understood what Yvonne and Geoff were going through. “When I had my first child almost 10 years ago, I was surprised that there were no resources here for parents struggling with sleeping difficulties. I bought every book out there and managed to get my little man sleeping for 12 hours straight. I became the ‘go to’ person among friends and family looking to get some sleep, and decided to get properly trained.”

Baby sleep consultant Edel Gargan also started her business after experiencing difficulties with her two children — Anna, eight, and Laragh, five.

“Anna had a dependency on the soother and I was up every 20 minutes replacing it during the night. The only advice I could get through my public health nurse/ doctor and books was to let her cry it out. As I am a Montessori teacher, this method went against all my beliefs. I found the whole process soul destroying, although it did work.

“Laragh had wind so I was constantly picking her up and she would only go to sleep on my shoulder. I didn’t want her to have to cry it out like Anna. I did a lot of research about different techniques and got Laragh sleeping using a very reassuring approach. As time went by I found more and more people were asking me for help. I then decided I wanted to formally train as a sleep consultant.”

Both sleep consultants interview and consult with the parents about their child’s habits, give tailored advice, but do not work directly with the children as they feel this comes better from the parents. They are there to give support to the parents throughout what can be a difficult time.

“Mostly I am contacted by parents whose children are waking multiple times in the night,” says Lucy Wolfe. “Ordinarily, the children have developed wrong sleep associations at bedtime and require intervention to help them to go to sleep and to go back to sleep, like rocking, feeding or nursing. I believe that the parent should be the one to deal with the child in order to maintain their secure bond and to alleviate any unnecessary stress on the child,” says Lucy. “Based on the information the parents give me, I will identify the issues and work out a suitable plan that suits the family unit and the individual child. I do not endorse ‘cry it out’, and educate the parents on how they can respond and soothe their child while fostering good sleep habits.”

Yvonne and Geoff came away from their meeting with Lucy Wolfe with tons of ideas about what to do. “I had to sit beside Josh’s bed for the first three nights,” says Yvonne, “then at the end of his bed for three nights, at the stair gate and then at the bottom of the stairs. So over 12 days he was learning to go to sleep in his own bed, on his own. We gave him a doll’s head for comfort and he plays with her hair. Again, it was exhausting at first and I told Lucy that I wanted to give up and let him back into our bed, but she encouraged me to keep going. Josh now sleeps from 7pm ‘til 6am.”

Lucy’s advice for how to help Sophie sleep was different. “We went ‘cold turkey’ with the bottle, so we didn’t give Sophie another bottle at night. When she cried we went in to comfort her, and sat by her cot until she settled, and then we left the room. It was exhausting at first, but after two nights she stopped waking up.

“We paid €300 total for both children and it was well worth it,” says Yvonne.

¦ Edel Gargan: www.babysleepacademy.com

¦ Lucy Wolfe: www.sleepmatters.ie

¦ www.naturallynurturing.co.uk

¦ The Sleep Lady’s Good Night, Sleep Tight: Gentle Proven Solutions to Help Your Child Sleep Well and Wake Up Happy by Kim West is published by Vanguard Press

Sleep tips

¦ Age appropriate bedtime: Some time between 7pm-8pm is a natural bedtime for a young child. Missing your child’s sleep window can make it hard for them to go asleep and to stay asleep.

¦ Relaxing and calm bedtime routine: A sequence of events focused on helping to wind the child down and get them ready for sleep, instead of doing something to put them to sleep like rocking, nursing or walking.

¦ Peaceful sleeping environment conducive to sleep: Should be adequately dark, avoiding bright external lights. Remove distractions, scary pictures, etc.

¦ Avoid night time feedings once no longer necessary: Frequent feeding through the night may result in a persistent requirement for night feeds with conditioned hunger and recurrent night-time waking.

¦ Put the child to bed more awake than asleep This will allow your child to learn how to fall asleep on their own. Be emotionally, physically and verbally responsive to them while they perfect the skill.

¦ Be consistent in your responses during the night: Changing your child’s sleeping location throughout the night, lying down with them, sometimes feeding them, sometimes allowing them to play, when they should be asleep will confuse them and ingrain night time activity.

¦ Adequate daytime sleep when appropriate: Make sure your child is getting enough sleep in the day.

¦ Source: www.sleepmatters.ie

© Irish Examiner Ltd. All rights reserved

Home