My Wedding Day with Ruth McIlroy: 'The day of our wedding was the first time we saw the venue'

James and Ruth McIlroy pictured on their wedding day.

We got married on June 12, 2021. It wasn't in the height of covid, but it was certainly influenced by covid.

We were living in Chester in the UK at the time, but our wedding was back in Northern Ireland, where we’re from, in Larne.

Because of covid, I couldn't go shopping for a wedding dress. Every time I booked an appointment, there was a lockdown, or the lockdown was extended, and the shops were closed again. 

I ended up having to get my dress made, which meant I didn't get the whole experience of shopping for a wedding dress — but because I was having a dress made, I focused very much on it being comfortable.

Our initial plans were to have a marquee in our house. We had that all arranged, but about four weeks out from the wedding, there were a few clampdowns on people having house parties that were in breach of covid rules. 

We checked the rules out, and as far as I was aware I had interpreted the rules correctly; I had a risk assessment done, and I was happy it was all above board.

Then about 10 days before the wedding, James got very twitchy and said: "Look, I would rather we had something very formal in black and white that said we're not doing anything illegal." 

So I reached out to the council with an email saying: "This is my interpretation of the covid rules. Can you confirm that I can have a wedding reception at my house and that this wouldn't be considered a house party?"

I got an email back that said the rules were ambiguous, and they would have to look into it and they would get back to me by the end of the day.

James and Ruth McIlroy: "Because of covid, I couldn't go shopping for a wedding dress. Every time I booked an appointment, there was a lockdown, or the lockdown was extended, and the shops were closed again."

The council then sent my query to Stormont, and it was tabled in Stormont at Question Time in the ministerial meeting on the Thursday! 

The upshot of it was they came back and said that what we were proposing would be interpreted as a house party, and as such, we would be limited to 15 guests. This was 10 days before the wedding.

I rang James, and he lost plot, so I ended that call as he was no help! I was on my way home from work thinking, 'who can I call to help with this?'. 

I eventually rang my wedding caterers, who had a dedicated wedding venue and asked if I could relocate my wedding from our house to their venue. 

They said yes, so by the time I got home from work the problem was essentially sorted out. 

We just transferred everything to the new venue — of course, I had to ring around all our guests and give them the new address for the wedding reception, but it was grand.

And the marquee we’d booked, we used it in August for the half marathon, so nothing went to waste! In fairness, the caterers were like our fairy godmothers.

The funny thing was that when we went to our wedding venue on our wedding day, it was the first time either James or myself had ever seen it! But it was fabulous.

We got married in the church of my childhood, where I grew up in Larne. I would have been happy just rocking up to a registry office but James wanted the big day, and getting married is about two people, so we did the big day. 

We had about 100 guests for the wedding, including James’ extended family from abroad who were able to celebrate the day with us.

James and Ruth McIlroy: "The funny thing was that when we went to our wedding venue on our wedding day, it was the first time either James or myself had ever seen it! But it was fabulous."

Again, because of covid I wasn’t able to get a hair trial before the wedding, so my hair looked a hot mess on the day. 

In fairness, I had no idea what I wanted for my hair so the hairdresser was at a disadvantage. The quick drive from the church to the wedding venue in our open-top car with the wind blowing through my hair sorted it out though!

One thing that worked out well, and I would advise any bride to do, is to give your florist a budget and ask them to work away. 

Our flowers were beautiful on the day, with a lovely cottage garden look, but that was all down to the florist.

We had a DJ at the reception venue and our first dance was to 'Whiter Shade of Pale' by Procol Harum. It’s a very long song, which we hadn’t considered when we were choosing it for our first dance!

When I look back now on the day, I have more memories about the morning in the house getting ready than I do for the rest of the day. 

Someone told me before I got married, that you spend the whole morning waiting for the wedding, and then the day goes by in a flash, and that’s exactly what it felt like. It was like a whirlwind.

• Ruth and James McIlroy organise the Antrim Coast Half Marathon, which takes place on August 24 at 11am. 
• The event attracts world-class runners every year, and interested athletes can register for the event at https://www.antrimcoasthalfmarathon.com/