From bad coffee to missing buses, 50 Cork things we need to fix — lovingly, loudly and now
Visitors are somehow surprised that a venue which has been in roughly the same location for over a century is... still in the same location.
Before Christmas I noted 40 things to love about Cork, just to get everyone in the spirit of the season. That’s me all over.
Now even more positivity. Don’t worry, I’ll be my usual Grinch-like self soon enough.
Tell your friends. You won’t find better than what you’re reading.
The liquefied tar, the sour petrol, the oily residue: enough. Give us the drinkable stuff.
Recently we reported here that construction on a light rail system in Cork can get underway during the lifetime of the current government, according to transport minister Darragh O’Brien. However, he also said to Paul Hosford of this parish: "The truth is I can't give you a timeframe on that right now, but we've got to get this through at each stage.”
This proposal needs to take in the northside of the city and extend to the Airport. Otherwise we’ll be here in 15 years’ time saying, ‘we need to take in the northside of the city and extend to the Airport’.
Kingfishr have had their year. My research assistants tell me Cliffords are a happening beat combo.
Is it Páirc an Easpaig Ó Luasa? Is it Páirc an Easpaig Uí Luasa? It is certainly not Páirc Easpaig Lucey. I don’t want to say that you’d expect more for the money spent, but... have either the local authority or Oifig an Choimisinéara Teanga received any correspondence on this?
Náireach.
This comes up when visitors are somehow surprised that a venue which has been in roughly the same location for over a century is... still in the same location. Hasn’t been moved to discommode you, believe it or not.
Let’s stop the cars having to edge down the centre of the Centre Park Rd when it rains. How hard is it to keep that road clear of vast pools of water?
The Marina area is a huge boost to the city. Kudos to the local authority. But we could do with that toilet being opened down by Cortado: it was announced months ago, after all. Still shut at press time.
Could we get a few more in town? Last year I wrote about the (unexpectedly) high costs of public toilets, yet music festivals all over the world seem able to put up portaloos by the dozen. We don’t need architectural miracles. Just toilets.
Doesn’t get any simpler than that. Forget Bus Connects for a while: it’ll be years before we see that. Just give us more buses, and drivers to use them.
Can we not get tap and go on the buses? Last Sunday we learned that it’s expected to take until 2029 for contactless payments to be rolled out across the public transport network. Seriously.
It’s time. You know it.
Mentioned this before, no improvement. Watch out for the out-of-county car registrations on vehicles tootling along in the left hand lane until it comes to an abrupt end, those vehicles swing out, and . . .
Obvious remedy.
I have not seen this motion picture but I know it concerns a famous Corkman having a disagreement. What Leeside-based contretemps can we film next? Perkin Warbeck’s issues with fifteenth-century royalty, maybe (working title: ).
Best of luck to Velvet, a new coffee shop on Patrick’s Quay. And best of luck to Alan Hurley’s new comic shop, opening soon in Market Parade.
If you know you know. If you don’t, relax. I’ll revisit soon.
You don’t know who Geese are?
Yes, that was me on the TG4 documentary last St Stephen’s Day. I mention it here to clarify a) I was FAR TOO YOUNG to be in Turner’s Cross/Flower Lodge to see the great man in person and to ask b) what nooks and crannies of Cork’s social history deserve similar documentaries?
Long-suffering readers will know of my mournful search for tripe and drisheen in the eateries of Cork. The Farmgate seems to be the only one providing this, so I’ll happily film — for the paper — any restaurant which will show me how to make this dish myself, Farmgate included. Open to bribery here.
It grieves me to tell you that our scone quality is dangerously low. As of this writing I can only stand over plain scones in Basil, Salt, and the Garden Cafe in Dwyer’s Electrical towards the Airport. I take no pleasure in saying that the situation is dire and must improve.
Can we suggest some t-shirt ideas? Because I have a couple.
Specifically the Chris-Craft Stinger 390X in the TV series.
I wrote here a few years back about , an RTÉ soap opera set in Cork which ran from 1969 to 1970. Can we revisit those golden days with a modernised version?
You know what I mean. And where I mean.
I think we could support another one in Cork — if it served coffee (see no 2) and scones (see no 21)
(Is this about books or your baser appetites — ed).
My social media handles are at the bottom. My email here is michael.moynihan@examiner.ie
The approaches to Cork have sober messaging — ‘welcome to Cork’ and such like. Could we not be more expressive on those signposts and indicate the gravity of entering on holy ground — Behold Nirvana And Tremble? They Can’t Get You Now, You’re Home?
Or my favourite possibility, in 12-foot white lettering on a red billboard: Cork. It’s real and it’s spectacular.
It’s just better that way, I think. For all of us.
The former NFL star is roaming America as a bowl-player. A bowl-player! He was out recently with the Boston Road Bowling club while visiting Massachusetts. We surely need Ból Chumann na hÉireann to get on this, STAT.
You know what to do.
- Michael Moynihan is at X: @mikemoynihanex Instagram: @mikemoynihanex TikTok: @mikemoynihanex
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