Listen up, under-30s — this is why we want you to use grammar properly

The Examiner's resident 'Gen-Z'er seemingly threw the cat in among the pigeons with a recent column on text/DM etiquette — here, two of her generational predecessors argue the toss over grammar and its role in daily life

Pic: iStock

A text that reads: “Sounds good. See you there on Thursday. Talk then.” is exactly what I want to see. It is to the point, and time is money.

‘Sticky Toffee & Date Pudding With Teelings Whiskey Ice cream.’ 

So read a section of the dessert menu at one of my favourite establishments.

My company noticed I had gone quiet. They assumed I was deep in thought, making one of the most important decisions of my day: What would herself with the big sweet tooth order?

“W-w-w-why does Teeling Whiskey have an ‘s’? Why is ‘ice’ capped up but not ‘cream’?” I asked aloud – to myself more so than anyone else, really.

“I didn’t spot that,” my cousin said, “but now that you’ve pointed it out, my night is ruined.” Yes, I am one of those: A grammar and punctuation Nazi – much to the dismay of my family members.

A couple of years ago, my brother exclaimed that “We can’t enjoy eating out anymore because Emily keeps criticising the layout of and spelling on a menu”, but the truth of it is: It’s not just menus.

At a Bingo Loco event in Dublin a few years back, a housemate of mine audibly sighed when I pointed out there was a missing apostrophe on the bingo sheet.

It read: “Lets get weird!” I took the booklet from everyone sitting at my table and marked the apostrophe in with a marker, but it physically and emotionally hurt me knowing that the venue was full of other participants just completely unaware of the grammatical TRAVESTY that lay before them.

Even now I get a slight twitch in my face thinking about it.

Emily Crowley, journalist. Picture: Denis Minihane.

Why am I saying all of this? Recently, my fellow Irish Examiner writer pointed out that her age group are offended by the use of the full stop in text messaging.

Our Gen Z columnist remarked: “I’d go with ‘there in 5’ – no need for capital letters or full stops.” 

Now, tickle me picky, but surely it’s more of an effort to turn the shift key off at the start of a text? 

(Also, I am a firm believer that numbers from one to nine are always to be spelled out – 10 onwards should be in digits, but perhaps that is just part and parcel of the day job.) 

I understand that it can seem quite formal and lacking a bit of warmth, but in certain instances grammar and punctuation are required.

I for one – a millennial who missed the boat to Gen Z by two years – ADORE when someone uses punctuation. A text that reads: “Sounds good. See you there on Thursday. Talk then.” is exactly what I want to see. 

It is to the point, and time is money. Each person knows where they stand; no more questions, no humming, no hawing.

A texter will receive serious brownie points if they go a step further and make use of the bold, italic, underline, and strikethrough text; I get giddy knowing there is emphasis somewhere in the sentence. (As an aside: I think I am the only person who enjoyed the recent – but since-reversed – update by WhatsApp to read a user is “Typing” or is “Online”.) But alas, I am fallible too. I often have to Google certain grammatical and punctuation queries – for example “year’s/years’ experience” stumped me for a while until I got the hang of it.

Another one is “for f*ck’s sake/for f*cksake” (this one was particularly important, it was for a work-related email).

What I’m saying is: We all make errors, so a punctuation mishap or a grammatical error won’t be the end of the world. But it does give a certain amount of order to the world, and there’s no shame in enjoying that. It all goes back to the “Panda: Eats, shoots and leaves” conundrum.

However, for millennials and some Gen Xers, a small error might ruin what was otherwise going to be a nice evening out, so bear that in mind.

Oh and by the way, I ordered the chocolate fondant.

- Emily Crowley, Millennial 

'I would like to see people of all generations ensure they know the difference between reins and reigns, lightning and lightening, and lose and loose'

Okay, a disclosure: there may be some people who feel rather strongly about grammar and some of these people may even have handed a homemade 'mothers day' card back to a child to have the very necessary apostrophe added. 

Some of that Mother's Day pedantry could have been pent-up frustration from very recently driving behind a van offering to clean and fix gutter's, chimney's and drive's. (It actually even hurt a little to re-write those for that last sentence.) 

Grammar matters. And while I don't want to come across all Hyacinth Bucket and insist on calling cards and formal dinner invitations, I do wonder what these Gen Zs will come for next if the lovely, crisp, and clean full stop is already on their hit list. 

Taking the care to use a full stop is like taking the care to not squash a little ant going about its business, I just don't understand why anyone would actively try to obliterate such an inoffensive and hard-working little dot. Annihilate the curly bracket or the ampersand first, for God's sake.

By the way, don't you just love the way the 'dot' becomes 'ponc ie' when someone calls out a website as Gaeilge!

I'm tempted to be all 'Hands off my ponc, you punk!' but at my advanced age (I'm hanging onto my 40s by arthritic fingertips) I'm aware that every new generation likes to challenge the previous ones. 

To be honest, I also kinda love those Gen Zs with their earnestness, commitment to skincare routines, and obsession with giant sippy cups and staying hydrated — if a grammar detail is where they want to rebel then that's just grand.

Also, just like ants have evolved and flourished (researchers estimate there are more than four quadrillion ants on this planet) so does language and grammar.

Caroline Delaney, Irish Examiner features writer

I may have more than one etymology and grammar book (yes Gen Zers, people still have books) on my bookshelves (and we also have bookshelves) at my house... and in several of those books it's noted that the words 'glamour' and 'grammar' actually come from the same root. Grammar originally meant the study of everything, but in a time when reading skills weren't widespread it became synonymous with knowledge of the supernatural or occult. 

And 'glamour' was a Scottish alteration of the word 'grammar' and was used in the sense of spells, magic, or enchantment. So mess with grammar and be ready for whatever havoc you might unleash. And for the more prosaic, it's worth knowing that some massive court cases have had Oxford commas and semi-colons as deciding factors.

Anyway, omitting that final full-stop or lánstad from a message just looks like you forgot it or ran out of energy. It has a vibe of someone bringing in a bundle of washing from the clothesline and not caring that they've dropped a sock or two along the way. (You'd never guess some GenZs live in my house, would you?) If you want to annihilate anything then may I suggest 'could of', 'should of' as legitimate targets.

While we're at it, I would like to see people of all generations ensure they know the difference between reins and reigns, lightning and lightening, and lose and loose.

We mightn't have a cute homemade card for you Gen Zs but we do actually like you and your safe little rebellions and your honesty — the way ye casually talk about things you couldn't drag out of repressed boomers or Gen Xs with feral hogs! Really, it's Gen Alpha we should all be focused on. They're the ones born from 2010-2024 and I have one of them in my house too. More than 2.8million are born globally each week. 

By next year they will number almost 2 billion — the largest generation in the history of the world. They're younger than AI, they are the product of remote learning, touchscreens, and streaming. Now they'll be the scary ones...

- Caroline Delaney, Generation X