COLM O'REGAN: As I read books to the toddler, memories are flooding back

I know we have to forget stuff. Biologically speaking, we need to put some experiences away.

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COLM O'REGAN: Forget the Papal visit. All I care about is the World Potato Congress

FORGET the Papal visit. All I care about is the Potatal visit. Put the date in your diaries: 2021, the World Potato Congress will be held in Ireland.

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COLM O'REGAN: World Cup: What makes an event enter the psyche so that it is endlessly celebrated until all involved are dead?

It starts officially tomorrow although celebrations have been underway for a little while. The 30th anniversary of Ireland’s Euro 88 adventure. Specifically, tomorrow marks 30 years since Ray Houghton’s goal.

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COLM O'REGAN: We finally got to fulfil our destiny: listening to a match in the car with the door open

Yes you could listen to a match while driving somewhere but there are distractions such as other vehicles coming towards you or a shitehawk with italic number plates ‘up your hole’ in the rearview mirror, writes Colm O’Regan.

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COLM O'REGAN: Most humbling thing? Eating your words.

“Truly humbling,” say some award-winners on receiving their gong. I call bullshit, writes Colm O’Regan.

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COLM O'REGAN: The fact that I’m wistful for the days when adults could physically assault children with impunity would suggest I am a natural fit for my new age group, the 40s

“WHAT are you going to do about it?” He had a point. The no doubt necessary rebalancing of rights, between adults and children, means there’s very little I can do about a couple of small boys squirting water at me in a park.

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COLM O'REGAN: It has come to my attention that podcasts are mighty yokes

This week on Stating The Bleeding Obvious, it has come to my attention that podcasts are mighty yokes altogether.

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COLM O'REGAN: Time to make some mid-year resolutions

By my made-up reckoning, 80% of TV now is some sort of competitive living, writes Colm O’Regan

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COLM O'REGAN: The telltale signs that spring has sprung in Ireland

Spring is finally here. I don’t mean the small amount of hot weather last Friday and
Saturday week. That was just an aberration. A wriggle in the curve.

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COLM O'REGAN: There I was thinking I was as sustainable as Bear Grylls on an island with only some lice and his own piss for company

The scientists discovered it by accident: An enzyme that eats plastic. Imagine discovering something that incredible by accident? I’ve never discovered anything by accident. At least not by myself.

 

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COLM O'REGAN: My goal was to find the T-shirt whose slogan was so funny... that women would want to be with me, men would want to be me

A significant capital investment is required. I cannot ignore the crumbling — and indeed bobbling — infrastructure for much longer. I’m going to have to buy some clothes.

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COLM O'REGAN: The pivotal moment a baby learns to crawl and haul

Set a baby down and within seconds she’ll be brandishing a previously unseen medieval mace in one hand and a gin-trap in the other, writes Colm O’Regan.

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COLM O'REGAN: I shouldn't enjoy The Crown...but I do

We’re watching The Crown at the moment. I’m miles behind, way back in series one, so don’t tell me what happens in the end.

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