Quickstep to success
“It’s never too late to fall in love with dance,” enthuses John, who has been dancing himself since he was just a toddler.
Some fears are uniquely Irish.
Many of us, for example, are plagued with recurring nightmares of sitting in an exam hall and bracing to complete the Leaving Cert paper with not a bit of study done.
Others may shiver at the mere thought of missing out on All-Ireland tickets, the one year our home county actually has a decent chance.
Perhaps because of our humble nature, though, the one thing all Irish people absolutely dread is looking like an eejit. For Irish wedding couples in particular, this issue manifests itself as a deadly fear of “the awkward shuffle.”
“Most people just want to get through their first dance with minimal embarrassment,” shares John Edward Nolan, acclaimed dancer and choreographer and former Dancing With The Stars pro.
“When couples come to me for dance classes, the majority of them prefer to learn a few simple steps just to get them from beginning to end, to avoid ‘the awkward shuffle’ as I call it!
“Most people just want very basic choreography, something to comfortably get them around the dance floor so that they don’t feel awkward in front of their guests. If that’s their goal, I’d generally recommend that they start training with their dance instructor two to three months before the wedding. It’s close enough to get them focused, but not too far out that they’ll forget everything they’ve learned before the big day.
“It all depends on the couple. People contact me with all sorts of different timeframes. Some people book classes a year before their wedding, or they do it six months before. Some people even contact me the week of the wedding! So I think it really comes down to the individual and what they want to get out of it.
"I’ve had people come in to me wanting to learn the simplest classical moves and then people who want to do the biggest, most theatrical performances with lifts and everything, swinging out of each other’s necks basically! It’s one extreme to the next.”
Regardless of how complex you want your own first dance to be, however, John recommends that it’s always best to seek professional guidance.
You never know exactly how nerves may strike on the big day itself, but the right preparation will carry you through in any case.
“One of the best ways to get over that anxiety is to just book in and do a few dance classes. That gives you a structure, so that you at least have a start, middle and end.
"You have a sort of mantra, that ‘I have x amount of time and x amount of steps until I get to the end’ and that means you can be focused on the dance itself rather than checking for people’s reactions or worrying whether you look awkward.
"Having choreography to follow gives you a focus; it’s something to take your mind off the nerves and can make your first dance more enjoyable to perform.”
When you work with a pro like John, it’s not just the bride and groom who get to enjoy the performance, either. It’s a treat for the whole wedding party!
“I always say, especially for a wedding dance, you can do something simple, and your guests are going to just love it. I actually always advise people to keep the wedding dance under wraps if they can.
"Maybe go and do a few lessons on the sly rather than letting people know, because then when you reveal the first dance as a surprise, you’re automatically going to impress people regardless of what you do.
“The most important thing for any couple to remember is that it’s their moment. It’s their first dance. I think people get too conscious of whether people will like it, or what their guests will think, even down to worrying about how popular their song choice should be.
"You can dance to any song! I always recommend they pick a song that has some meaning to them, whether it’s a slow romantic one or a more fun upbeat one. The priority should be that it’s your moment together to celebrate.”
As well as all the pressure of what guests will make of the performance, it can also be hard to drown out wider outside noise when it comes to nailing the first dance.
From TikTok tutorials to YouTube choreography guides, there can be a lot of conflicting advice online for amateur dancers to get their heads around.
“I personally think you can't beat learning in person,” John explains. “A good instructor will be able to get to know you face-to-face, so they can tailor the classes to cover exactly what the couple needs. It's more personalised, you're not getting general advice thrown at you.”
Who knows, attending dance classes with your partner may even kickstart a new love story all of its own!
