Good organisation and cleaning will put you back in control of your home, says Kya deLongchamps

In November, I took my partner to New Orleans to celebrate his 30th birthday – yes, you’re right, I am a great girlfriend! Thank you for saying so, writes Louise O'Neill.

In the interests of brevity, I’ll paraphrase: women would love to eat Doritos like men but are afraid of being judged as geezer-birds. Cue Lady Doritos

Maria Sharapova’s racket sponsor is backing the grand slam winner and is planning to extend its contract with her despite admitting to failing a drugs test.

Maria Sharapova has only herself to blame for failing a drugs test, according to former World Anti-Doping Agency chief Dick Pound as the Russian former Wimbledon champion faces an uncertain future in the sport and the cost of losing headline sponsors.

Maria Sharapova is counting the cost of her failed drug test after three major sponsors moved to distance themselves from the tennis superstar.

Although Germany is leading the European reaction to the refugee tragedy by welcoming hundreds of thousands to its cities; the reaction of the rest of the world, most especially the United States, has been one of offering advice and criticism from afar. 

In a world where models and actresses are the new wellness gurus, thank god

Atletico Madrid remain third in La Liga after they drew 1-1 with fourth-placed Valencia at the Vicente Calderon last night. Koke put the home side ahead but Valencia equalised through Shkodran Mustafi.

So, what does the fox say? Its Norwegian creators would probably respond “money, money, money” after the parody music video was yesterday named the top trending video around the world and in Ireland this year.

Tottenham 1 Hull 0

The first day’s play in the Evian Championship has been abandoned after heavy rain made the course in France unplayable.

Paris St Germain sporting director Leonardo felt David Beckham was unlucky to be sent off in the closing stages of last night’s 1-0 Ligue 1 win at Evian.

David Beckham made his Paris St Germain debut last night as Carlo Ancelotti’s men took a potentially vital step towards claiming the Ligue 1 title.

Manager Tito Vilanova has down played the standoff between David Villa and Lionel Messi during Barcelona’s hard-fought 2-0 victory over Granada.

I hate flying. I had a minor panic attack on a propeller flight a couple of years back and I haven’t quite got over it. So from the minute I snap on my seatbelt, I sit there with sweaty palms and a fixed grimace and wait for the drinks trolley to roll my way.

The Netherlands 0 Denmark 1

France

George Clooney’s quip about the Kerry actor’s manhood sees the Irishman join a long line of well-endowed leading men, says Ed Power

‘JESUS seeks fourth victory over dragon’ is one of those headlines which most journalists can only dream of — except in Portugal, where the dragon is the symbol of Porto and Jorge Jesus is manager of Benfica.

ACCEPTED wisdom throughout the football world, from Moscow to Munich, is that it is unrealistic to pay muchattention to the league table early on — especially when only three games have been played, as is the case with Milan and Madrid.

REAL MADRID slumped to their first defeat of the season after suffering a 1-0 setback at Levante last night.

Liverpool director of football Damien Comolli has praised owners Fenway Sports Group for their “brave” approach to the transfer window.

Arsenal rounded off a busy transfer deadline day with the sensational last-gasp £10m swoop for Everton playmaker Mikel Arteta.

French club Evian have today confirmed the signing of Liverpool midfielder Christian Poulsen.

Liverpool new boy Sebastian Coates has revealed that the Reds’ Uruguayan striker Luis Suarez played a pivotal role in helping him decide to move to Anfield.

Liverpool have announced they have reached an agreement with French side Evian for the transfer of Christian Poulsen.

Gerard Depardieu has apologised for urinating on a plane.

IN On the Road, Jack Kerouac wrote about “the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow Roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars”.

Winona Ryder sent a message of apology to Natalie Portman after filming ‘Black Swan’, it has emerged.

Unlikely singing star Susan Boyle was the year’s biggest hit on the internet’s most popular video channel YouTube, according to figures released today.

FRENCH police are expected to move in today to clear the immigrant camp in Calais known as “the jungle”, and detain about 1,500 mainly Afghan asylum seekers.

I WONDER if your front page report headlined ‘Consumers splash out €205m on bottled water’ (August 12) prompted readers to ask why otherwise sensible people spend their hard-earned money on what is after all a free gift of nature?

LETTERS have been sent to maternity hospitals from an environmental group warning them of the dangers of using tap water in newborn babies’ formula feed.

US drinks giant Coca-Cola is in talks regarding a possible buy-out of bottled water firm Highland Spring in Scotland, it was reported today.

John Mark Karr, the suspect in the killing of six-year-old JonBenet Ramsey, arrived in the US after a 15-hour flight from Thailand on which he sipped champagne, dined on fried king prawns and roast duck, and exchanged what he described as “small talk” with law enforcement escorts.

England’s Laura Davies has staged a remarkable comeback to form this season and she goes into the final major, the Weetabix Women’s British Open, as a genuine title contender.

France’s Gwladys Nocera clinched her third title of the Ladies’ European Tour season with a third successive 69 in the Catalonia Ladies’ Masters.

STRONG cider sales will boost turnover 9% in the current year drinks to snacks group C&C said yesterday.

C&C GROUP has lost a €12 million contract to distribute Volvic and Evian bottled water in Ireland.

The ISEQ finished the day down 26.20 points at 6605.71 despite a €2.03 upsurge to €35.88 by technology firm Icon PLC.

The ISEQ was up 1.17 points at 6633.08 at 11am today.

ISEQ-listed food and beverage company C&C has lost its contract to distribute Danone's Volvic and Evian products in the Republic of Ireland from November 30.

Political Editor Harry McGee looks at how TDs and senators supplement their Oireachtas salary.

TÁNAISTE and Minister for Health and Children, Mary Harney, became the fourth “Mary” to receive the top accolade in the Irish Tatler Women of the Year Award last night.

In its first interim report since its initial public offering (IPO) and listing on the ISEQ and the London Stock Exchange, C&C Group has said group turnover is up by about 4% while margins were "broadly unchanged".

French food and drinks giant Danone today confirmed controversial plans to sell Jacob’s.

Demi Moore has been enjoying a comeback since her appearance in the Charlie's Angels sequel and her highly publicised romance with Ashton Kutcher.