We have ways of making you run

It is somewhat disappointing that, despite all the fine, sophisticated minds operating at the top top levels of football, nobody has yet landed on any kind of labour-saving system.

Despite all the philosophies and tactical innovation, nobody has so far devised methods that will function well at 60% or 70%. The kind of levels that would represent an outstanding day’s work for mere mortals.

Even 90% is no use to them, these great thinkers. In the never-ending auction, they all want 110%, 120%, 200%, a million percent, even a gillion percent, according to Paul Merson.

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