Swallows are back and Trump is on the way

I have mighty good news for all of you this week.

Many of ye will hardly believe your eyes before you reach the end of this entirely joyous episode of our amazingly colourful history.

But then, ye will remember that you encounter brightly gleaming slivers of the pure truth here every week, and will relax and feel happy for the rest of May and far beyond that.

Golden times are upon us, after a couple of harsh decades that cut us all to the marrow of our green bones.

In the rich tradition of the storytellers of our past, who always spun out a good yarn to the last, in an obscurely lovely way which beguiled and enchanted their audiences around the blazing hearths of yesteryear, I begin with what is seasonal over our Four Green Fields, the arrival of the swallows.

Because of various climatic changes which we are all being informed of fully, across the mainstream media outlets, some pessimists were doubting we would ever see them over my Shannon again.

They were wrong, because they have arrived exactly on cue, and our Co Clare skies are ringing sweetly with their swooping tweets and twitters.

Many of ye are glad to welcome them back too, I have no doubt at all.

However, the tweets and twitters in the clear skies above, whilst heartwarming, are matched this glorious May by the new genre of tweets and twitters across the social media, revealing that one flame-haired demigod from this coast of the Wild Atlantic Way is flying over to the New World, to claim his rightful stardom in a TV series which we will all be hearing and viewing on our TV screens before the end of this very year.

I refer, of course, to our great King Brian Boru from this Dalcassian parish, the last real High King of Ireland, he who defeated the Danes at the Battle of Clontarf, fair play to him. He is getting his full recognition across the globe at long last. Another upcoming pure truth.

But it gets even better than that, better and brighter by far.

Because my reliable sources in West Clare, especially around Shannon Airport and Doonbeg, assured me this week that whilst there is no official announcement at the time of writing this, it is now certain that another flame-haired demigod will flash into Clare and Ireland, to work his unfailing magic for us all, in a matter of a few weeks.

I refer, of course, to President Donald Trump of the USA, who will bless us all with his presence for four or five days, about the time that Brian Boru is becoming a real star in Canada and the United States.

Watch this space for further details.

That’s only the start of the great news.

A Seventh Son of a Seventh Son in West Clare, a rare and specially gifted seer, who is always on the mark with his predictions, told me today, when I rejoiced at the tweets and twitters of the flocks of swallows, that these were clear psychic messages (for men like himself) that President Trump, the real maestro of the twitters and tweets of this new world, would be so anxious to express his anger at the chaotic fiascos surrounding Westminster, that he would solve all our relatively petty problems around health and housing shortages, and hard or soft borders and suchlike, with a dawn salvo of twitters and tweets from his Doonbeg Golf Resort.

Said my source, whom I cannot name publicly here: “He’ll play a round of golf on his own links, on his second morning in Doonbeg.

“He’ll win, of course, and then he will Twitter and Tweet for an hour, long before you are even awake,Cormac, and sure he is better with these modern swords of power than even Brian Boru was in his prime.

“Mark my words. Those swallows are sending lads like me a clear message of brilliant times ahead, not for the Brits, but for the people of a nation Donald Trump has always had great respect for.”

A final morsel of information was passed on to me by another reliable source a little later.

It was that there are no connections or relations of Robert Mueller, the special counsel overseeing investigation of alleged Russian interference in the US presidential election, residing anywhere in Co Clare. This allows the American leader to relax totally, after his testy enough stay in London.

So, we can all relax, and enjoy the emerging summer that will transform all our futures.

Let’s smile broadly as the twittering and tweeting swallows hint in their own melodious fashion at mighty times ahead.

Remember ye read that great news here first too.

Where else would you get it!

More on this topic

Donald Trump to play golf and watch sumo wrestlers during Japan visit

Donald Trump arrives in Tokyo for state visit, golf and sumo

Donald Trump arrives in Japan for state visit, golf and sumo

Judge blocks Trump from building sections of border wall

More in this Section

Damaging pest will spread across China’s grain production within 12 months

Australia turns to imports to help offset crop losses

Kilkenny unveils new digital innovation hub

Education holds the key to tackling food waste issue


Gardening: Something for everyone at Chelsea Flower Show

Relishing the Riviera: St Tropez still the jet set destination it has always been

Restaurant review: Ristorante Rinuccini - Kilkenny

The Wine List: Will 2019 see the rise of rosé in Ireland?

More From The Irish Examiner