AIDA AUSTIN: So I bought vegetables and for 27 years I made my offspring eat them

My children had all sorts of lofty ambitions when they were little: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, doggy rescuer, famous gymnast, Georgie Best. “Vegetable Eater” never got a mention. 

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AIDA AUSTIN: What would be your first thoughts as you run from your smoking car?

‘I’ve seen car explosions. I saw poor Apollonia go up in The Godfather," writes Aida Austin

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AIDA AUSTIN: 'Having blue rope in your boot has got nothing to do with wealth'

9 am. My three sisters and I are in a taxi, heading towards Pestana Palace Hotel where my brother is staying; he’s invited us to join him for breakfast on the terrace and spend the morning in the hotel grounds before we fly home from Lisbon this afternoon.

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AIDA AUSTIN: Unless you’re very careful, Mum says, I think you’re going to be up all night

It’s 8.30pm — and my three sisters and I are sitting at a restaurant table in Bairro Alto, Lisbon’s old bohemian district. 

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AIDA AUSTIN: I know, let’s draw straws. Short straw gets the box room

5 pm.

Lisbon. I’m in an Airbnb apartment with my three sisters. It is day one of our city break and we are allocating rooms.

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AIDA AUSTIN: 'It’s hard to hear anything over the racket of my luggage wheels'

I’M IN Stansted airport with two of my sisters, heading for Lisbon, where our youngest sister is waiting for us.

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AIDA AUSTIN: I want you to practise finding your boarding card in downloads

My three sisters and I have just arrived at our Airbnb apartment in Lisbon and bagsied bedrooms, with disappointing results; I got the box room and have taken my disappointment off to the toilet.

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AIDA AUSTIN: 'God knows how anyone has an affair with a human the lying is bad enough when it’s only a bike'

MONDAY. I’ve been having a secret love affair for two weeks but have managed to keep it on the down-low. Heaven forbid my husband should ever discover that I’ve fallen in love. With an old bike.

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AIDA AUSTIN: Personally, I don’t mind a bit of wrinkle. It shows it’s been washed

Our first Airbnb booking arrives this afternoon; my husband is strimming the back garden and I am on the phone to my sister.

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AIDA AUSTIN: Clean the bathroom with a toothbrush. You can’t be too careful about hair, particularly the pubic variety

I’M thinking of doing Airbnb. I tell a friend.

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AIDA AUSTIN: Perhaps my ego is about to be stroked

If you’re a maker of any sort, as I am, you’ll know that your ego is at least partially dependent upon your ability to sell what you make. 

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AIDA AUSTIN: 'If the plane goes down, we both die. I don’t suppose we’ve got a will sorted?'

Driving towards Cork Airport to catch a flight, “I feel a bit odd,” my husband says.

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